‘You must be Josh. Welcome to the Department of Paranormal Research. Have you brought the vaccination certificate?’

‘Sorry?’ I could not take my eyes away from her teeth.

‘Proof of vaccinations against Ly-C and vampire venom.’

I pulled out crumpled documents. ‘Yes, yes.’

The receptionist noticed that my hands were shaking. She smiled. I started to tremble even more. Yet, I needed to stay calm; I could not fail my tutor again.

‘Alright, let me look at your documents.’ She glanced up. ‘You are younger than my nose was telling me.’

The receptionist reached her clawed paw towards the phone and dialled. ‘Annika, your work experience boy is here. Yes, he is succulent, but definitely above the age. Alright.’ She hung up and looked at me expectantly. ‘Annika is awaiting you on the top floor.’
Taking a deep breath, I marched towards the stairs. While climbing, I constantly looked over my shoulder, half expecting the receptionist to crawl her scaled body right behind me.

I was panting by the time I reached the top floor, but I straightened when I saw a woman, a human woman, thank the Gods, walking towards me. Her blonde fringe jumped with every step. Yet, the red claws she reached out in greeting made me freeze in one place.

She let out a quiet chuckle. ‘It’s just a manicure. I can’t carry personal weapons in the workplace, but nail extensions are off limits. Otherwise, half of the Department would be in trouble. I always liked E&D, I must say.’

‘What is E&D?’

‘Equality and Diversity. But come on now, you are so red. Why didn't you take the lift?’

‘I don’t do well in small spaces.’ I swallowed.

‘Then you will like your office for the day. Follow me.’

The office was spacious, with a large window offering a beautiful view of the city. However, I was baffled by the extra-large sofa between two desks.

‘Yeah, I sometimes sleep at work,’ said Annika, sitting behind her desk. ‘I try to be accommodating, so when Dr Valchi, from the basement level, wants to have a mid-day meeting, I sleep here.’

‘Midday meeting?’ I frowned and gently put my bag on the desk.

‘Midday for her, midnight for me. I would rather be amenable. You had your venom vaccines done, haven’t you?’

‘Yes, eh, I left my certificate with…’ my voice trailed off.

‘Onilka, yes. She is a sweetheart. She will keep the hard copy at the Reception until you finish.’

A sweetheart? I bit my tongue not to question that.

‘Sit down, Joshi. You don’t mind me calling you that, do you?’ Annika pointed at the desk opposite. ‘Let's prepare for our next meeting. Grab the PPE.’

‘Excuse me?’

‘Personal protective equipment. In the drawer on your left.’

I reached down and took out a pair of black sunglasses. ‘What are these for?’

‘For the sukkub meeting. I mean, she did the DBS for working with vulnerable adults, but still….’

‘I am not a vulnerable adult.’

‘Do you have eyeballs? Yeah, so you are vulnerable.’ Annika reached into her own drawers and took out a similar pair of glasses. ‘Sukkubs are female demons who seduce men to sustain themselves. Not much either party can do about it, so with Sorei in the room, PPE is a must.’

‘Surely it can't be that bad,’ I muttered, but put the glasses on.

‘I have been in HR for decades, but she still makes me question my sexuality.’ Annika pulled her fringe aside and fitted the glasses. ‘You will be taking minutes. Don’t do them verbatim. And sit quietly. And don’t salivate’.

I fumbled through my bag to get the notepad, biting down the comment that I was not a dog and could behave professionally. There was a knock on the door, and then she walked in.

Gods, I love HR. I want to work here. I will never leave.

Annika chuckled lightly. ‘Sorei, when you said that you had an accident at work, I was kinda hoping it would be a near miss. However, it doesn’t look like it.’

Only then I lowered my gaze from Sorei's beautiful eyes, framed with dark eyelashes, from her rose lips and velvet skin. Only then I noticed a characteristic bump at the front of her body.

‘Joshi, what did I tell you about salivating?’

I straightened and looked away from the pregnant sukkub and back to my empty pages. In the corner of my eye, I could see Annika lowering her glasses for a moment to look Sorei up and down. She pulled them up quickly when she finished the inspection.

‘Have a seat, Sorei. And while you do that, please tell me the accident didn’t involve a study patient.’

‘It did not.’ Sorei rested gracefully on the sofa.

‘Joshi, are you taking notes, or what?’

‘Sorry!’ I grabbed my pen and started noting.

‘And I understand you filled the Accident Book in the Lab?’ Annika turned back to Sorei.

‘I filled it as a near miss, initially.’ She clasped her delicate hands together. ‘That was before we realised that the PPE was… faulty.’

‘Have you reported it to Health & Safety?’

‘I didn’t need to. He kind of… knew.’

‘So you are saying the… accident… involved Marshal? Our H&S Manager?’ Annika’s red nails started clanking on the desk. ‘Yeah, now I wish it was a patient. I have both maternity and paternity to fill for the Department.’

‘Is this a long procedure?’ Sorei sounded worried.

‘Of course not. I am just joking. Joshi, focus, would you?’

I realised my mouth was wide open, so I closed it quickly and jotted down a few words. Maternity. Paternity. Kill Marshal. I crossed the last one quickly.

‘Leave it with me, Sorei.’ Annika got up from the chair. ‘If you don't mind me asking, how long until the delivery?’

‘I don't know.’ Sorei lowered her beautiful eyes to look at her bump. ‘I will dial Italy to check with my grandmother.’

‘Okay, just keep me updated.’ Annika ushered Sorei out of the office and shut the door. ‘What would I do for one boring day in this job.’

‘I thought HR was boring.’

‘Human Resources can be, yeah.’ She sighed with a strange longing. ‘But when it comes to Everyone Else Resources, well... No two days are the same.’

‘I really like the sound of this job so far.’ I nodded eagerly.

‘Of course you would,’ Annika chuckled and took off her sunglasses. ‘Now, show me your notes.’

I glanced down and felt heat rise to my cheeks. ‘They are not ready yet’, I mumbled. ‘I need to check the grammar and….’

Annika took the notepad from my hands. ‘Wonderful. Love. Beauty. World. Maternity. Paternity. What is this squiggle? Kill… Marshal. Interesting that.’

Taking the sunglasses off, I wiped my face, trying to cover the paralysing embarrassment. That must be the end of my work experience. How long did I last? Thirty minutes? Gods, what will I tell my tutor?

‘It seems you have assigned yourself a great task, Joshi.’ Annika smirked and returned the notepad. ‘I will give you the paternity leave application, which you will take to Marshal.’

‘Will I?’ I suddenly felt faint.

‘Sure you will. As soon as you see him, sukkub influence will evaporate.’

I shook my head and watched her run red nails through her fringe, putting it back into shape. ‘Annika, could I ask how did you manage to remain calm?’

‘It comes with experience. And this is why you are here. If you are thinking about a career in HR, you need to show me you have the balls to do it.’

‘Balls?’ I muttered. Not quite what I expected in the professional environment.

‘Balls.’ Annika reached into her drawer and showed me a selection of small crystal balls.
‘Only then can you realise that you can't be prepared for everything.’

I stood up and squeezed my notepad. Balls I needed, and balls I shall find.
Once I found the paternity application, all sixty pages, Annika bid me farewell. I clutched the wad of papers and headed downstairs to find the staff directory.

‘Doing alright, Josh?’ Onilka, the sweetheart, greeted me at the Reception. ‘Joining me for lunch?’

‘Not yet’, I choked out, overwhelmed by scary images of torn flesh my brain was bombarding me with. ‘I am looking for Marshal.’

‘Ahh, yes. He's on the same floor as Dr Valchi. The basement.’

‘Is he a vampire?’ I whispered. My previous assignment didn't go very well because, as it turns out, not only small spaces have an adverse effect on me.

‘Of course not.’ Onilka waved her scaly paw. My sigh of relief was audible enough for Onilka to smile with a reassurance.

I took the stairs to the lowest floor. To the very narrow corridor. Very dark corridor. I swear, if the application had twenty more pages, I would not be able to fit in between the walls. Deep breath in. There is enough air in here. Slow breath out. I was in no danger.
Little hairs on my body stood up, signalling it was a lie.

‘And what are you looking for in here?’ I heard a deep, male voice.

I flinched when a tall man just appeared next to me. Gods, his eyes. Two black holes in the navy face. Jagged teeth.

‘Mmm… Marsh…’

‘Marshal?’ The man leaned his head to one side. ‘It is him. What can I help you with?’

My knees weakened. My mouth felt dry. Trembling, I extended the wad of paperwork toward him. He didn't accept it, just stared at the paper for a long, long moment.

'What is this?’ He asked with a terrifying calm.

‘P-paternity application.’ I didn't need to pass my work experience. To hell with the tutor. To hell with HR.

‘That I see. What do you want me to do with this?’

‘Complete it,’ I whispered, ‘please.’

Marshall shook his head. ‘Has that witch sent you?’

‘Witch?’

‘Annika. She knows that bureaucracy makes me want to murder everyone.’

I cleared my throat. ‘She didn't mention that.’

Marshal looked at me for a long moment. Finally, he took the paperwork from my hands. His talons grazed my skin, but I did not dare to twitch.

‘Breathe, man,’ said Marshal. ‘I like drum & bass, but it’s not healthy for the human heart to beat that fast.’ He looked up from the paperwork. ‘I now need to include a heart attack in the risk assessment.’

I took a deep breath in. ‘My job is done here,’ I declared, while fighting the urge to run out of the basement.

I calmly backed out of the corridor and up the stairs. Then into the lobby. Up the stairs again. Into the office. I shut the door and barricaded it with my own body. Only then I realised I was drenched with sweat.

‘Did you deliver the paperwork?’ Annika threw a kitchen towel on me once I nodded. ‘Well done you! You passed your work experience with an excellent score.’

My knees gave under me, and I slid against the door. ‘That's it? It has only been an hour.’

‘You have been gone for four hours, Joshi. Since it was your first time, and you came back alive, yeah, I will turn a blind eye to this.’

‘Four hours?’ I stopped wiping my face. ‘Alive?’

‘Didn't I tell you that Marshal is the Destroyer of Worlds, the Siphon of Time and Space?’

My stomach rose to my throat. ‘The Destroyer of Worlds?’

‘The one and only.’ Annika smiled wickedly. ‘I bet we will have the basement to rebuild by the time he reaches page ten. Don't fret, Joshi; I already called the insurer.’

The world started spinning again. I closed my eyes.

The only thing I remembered afterwards was the scaly paw handing back the vaccination certificates. I sobered up after taking a deep breath of fresh air in front of the Department. The red stamp on my work experience certificate shone in the dawn. And in the pocket on my chest lay a small crystal ball.